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Dear Religious Policeman: - My Inner Child plays with matches.

About Dear Religious Policeman:

Previous Entry Dear Religious Policeman: May. 15th, 2006 @ 01:19 am Next Entry
The Mike Crichton who writes this blog is indeed the guy who's been posting comments on your blog. He spent eight and a half years in the United States Army, as a Military Intelligence Soldier. Specifically, as an Arabic linguist. He was in Iraq for almost the whole of 2005, doggedly translating between the natives and his fellow grunts. While he has spent most of the past 5 months attempting to wash all memory of the Middle East out of his brain with alcohol, he still has enough command of the Arabic language to confidently call you a fake. He also occasionally refers to himself in the third person for dramatic effect.

For everyone else reading this, the "Religious Policeman" is a blogger who claims to be a Saudi Arab. You wanna see his blog, do a google search, 'cuz I don't wanna give him any traffic directly. I thought he was funny, and I planned to link him, but it soon became obvious to me that he was a fraud. Then I posted a comment on his blog telling him so. Now he's claiming that _I'm_ a fake, and really someone else who's already called him out, posting under a new false name. Which, I suppose, is _possible_; This post _could_ have been written by someone else, who cunningly imitated the writing style of this "Mike Crichton" person, after stealing his password. Or maybe "Mike Crichton" never existed, and this blog was a fake from the beginning, an elaborate ruse planned for years for the sole purpose of attempting to discredit a Heroic Arab Dissident. Who DOESN'T EVER POST ANYTHING IN ARABIC ON HIS BLOG, has made some truly egregious errors in the language, and insists on posting anonymously, 'for his own safety'. (That last one is actually plausible, but combined with the first two, well...)

Update, 10 minutes later: Upon rereading the thread, I noticed that he edited my comment in a misleading manner. When I wrote:
I ain't buyin' it. I think the reason you don't post anything in Arabic is because you can't, at least not at anything resembling a native level, and you don't want to risk getting caught out. Like, say, mistaking "Farah" for a man's name, or putting an "f" in the middle of "qahwa".

He changed it to:
I ain't buyin' it. I think the reason you don't post anything in Arabic is because you can't, at least not at anything resembling a native level, and you don't want to risk getting caught out. Like, say, mistaking "Farah" for a man's name (although of courseit was the name of that famous Somali terrorist in "Black Hawk Down" - great film), or putting an "h" in the middle of "qahwa".

Gee, putting words in a commenter's mouth, and changing the ones he did write... _that's_ a surefire way to convince people of your integrity. :-P

He followed that altered comment with this:
Hi Michael Crichton aka AbuSinan, how you doing? Long time, no hear! Have you got the "Marxism" reference yet?

Clever trick, linking to someone else's blog. But your spoof IP address gives you away. So not that clever, after all.

I had hoped that if you visited, you'd benefit us with a wide range of views and opinions. But given your obsession with Irish and Palestinian terrorists, and my identity, I'm afraid you're just a "One-trick Pony".

For the record, here's what I wrote in response. Let's see if he edits this comment too:
You know what happens when you "assume" things[linked to this page]. I figured out you were a fake before reading Abu Sinan's blog, BTW.

Cute the way you edited my comment with that Blackhawk Down reference. I'm perfectly aware of who Muhammad Farah Aidid was, and I'm also aware he was Somali, not Arab. I'm sure somewhere there's an American male named "Sue", but no english speaker would assume it was a male name unless they already knew the guy.

And incidentally, editing someone's comments without noting the edit (or as they say in the real world, "misquoting" and "lying"), is hardly going to convince anyone of your honesty. Neither will replacing the "f" with an "h" in the example I used.

I followed that with:
By the way, what "Spoof IP address" are you talking about? Was this an honest mistake on your part, or another little fib?

Further update, 2 hours later: Predictably, the twit deleted both those comments, presumably so he could get the last word. What little doubt I had about his lack of honesty are now resolved. I posted one last comment for him, but I think that about fills the blog-drama quota for today:

What, no response to my last two posts? All you could do was delete them to make it look like you had the last word? Can't you be man enough to admit to the world that you were wrong about your assumption as to _my_ identity? Tsk, tsk. I'm sure you'll delete this too, But I just wanted to let you know that I am now more sure than ever that you're a fake, and that eventually, the truth will out. Don't worry, you'll still be able to get a job commenting on Fox News...

Yet another update, next day: He deleted that one too. What a jerk! I had no choice but to comment again on another thread:
Why'd you delete my last three comments on this thread? Was it because I demonstrated that I wasn't "Abu Sinan", because I questioned your claim about a 'spoofed IP address', or because I called you out for deceptively editing my previous comment? Enquiring minds want to know!

Everyone needs a hobby, I guess...

Final update: Aww, he banned me. I'm crushed, I tell you, crushed.

Really Final update, this time I mean it: Here's some other people who think he's a fake. I don't necessarily agree with _all_ of their reasoning; there are plenty of people who learn English as adults yet attain 'native' fluency. Still, his apparent lack of proficiency in Arabic is pretty damning.
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Date:May 15th, 2006 11:07 pm (UTC)
Yeah, maybe this Mike Crichton guy has never existed and I just imagined that I went to a con with a guy dressed as a pirate.... Although why I would imagine that in particular....
[User Picture Icon]
Date:May 16th, 2006 12:11 am (UTC)
A devastatingly handsome pirate, no less. I mean, as long as we're stretching the truth here... ;-)
Date:May 16th, 2006 03:16 am (UTC)
Very interesting stuff, Mike.

Something to watch.


Date:May 16th, 2006 10:31 pm (UTC)
You're not real? We've been imagining you for all these years? Boy that is a long hallucination-29 years...
Date:May 18th, 2006 02:12 am (UTC)
I am the "Abu Sinan" in question. See, the "RP" has a tendency to see any and all opposition to him as emminating from myself. I guess I should take that as a compliment. Although, seeing how the "RP" likes to blast others for conspiracy theories, his own indulgence in the practice is a bit amusing.

He e-mailed me several times recently, wanting to chat and get all friendly. Of course, I wasnt interested. I would have been REALLY interested if he, as a self-proclaimed Saudi, would have been willing to carry on the conversation in Arabic, but as we all know, the many doesnt know any more Arabic than George Bush, so that wasnt possible.

In between offering me "pardons" so I could come back to his blog and trying to get me to talk about me new baby, he was trying to make me understand his posts. Anyway, why he would want me back is beyond me, so he can just ban me again?

The guy is no Saudi, he is no Arab. He cannot, and does not, find his own source information in Arabic. Everything he gets is translated by someone else, taken from someone else's sources. The only translations he has post have been taken from other people's sites. Plainly put, the guy(if that is what he is) cannot read or speak Arabic.

I offered once to have a on-line chant session, Arabic only, on his site. I suggested we open a blog post and just have notable Arabic bloggers participate, only in Arabic. No personal question. Heck, we could talk about his supposed love of Chricket and Arsenal FC for 30 minutes for all I care. But that would have once and for all sorted the issue. Of course he declined.

The only Arabs that buy his story are those who agree with his ultra liberal pro-Western ideas. None of them seem to ask themselves "why cannot this supposed Saudi speak to me in my own language."

Anyway, the "RP" gives himself too much credit. My wife and I just had a baby see I have hardly had much time on my own blog, let alone create and work a whole different blog with the sole purpose of getting at him. Delusions of grandure. He calls me(whilst talking to you) a one trick pony, but if there was ever a one trick pony it is him.

His site is nothing more than made up fictional stories about the Saudi royal family, doodling with Photoshop, and stealing and changing stuff he finds on other sites. I still read his site, but it is boring. There are only a few types of posts he ever does:

1. Make up story including Saudi royals doing something stupid, include photosopped pictures.

2. Take news story and use it as a way to slam Saudi royal family and slam Islam.

3. Get facts and ideas about Islam wrong, ie worshipping the black stone.

It is a bore. I think his main reason for doing it is all of the "you arent the typical Muslim" and "you give me hope for the backward poor Arabs of the world" hero adulation.

The man is no Muslim, the man is no Arab.

I hate the Saudis almost more than anyone I know. My wife and I, her family, we have all suffered at the hands of the Saudi authorities at one level or another. So it is obvious I am not going against the "RP" to protect the Saudi establishment. The sooner they all rot in hell the better. I was actually one of "RPs" fans before he came back again.

But then his inconsistancies became glaring. His agenda seemed less to do with anti-Saudi than it did anti-Arab and often even anti-Islam. I searched his name on the web and found he had posted under Jewish people's names on a well known neo-con site. I saw a post of his where he slaughtered Arabic and refused to continue the conversation in Arabic for fear of falling prey to Prince Nayf, the head of the MoI. As if a conversation in Arabic would give the MoI anything to work on. All that would do is make it clear that he doesnt speak Arabic, let alone with a Najdi accent.

But, that is all fine. If people want to listen to his boring reruns, let them. You'll find that almost all of his readership, and certainly his posters, are Western non Muslims. His traffic from Saudi comes almost completely from Western ex pats.
Date:May 18th, 2006 02:13 am (UTC)
For a man claiming to want to reform Saudi, he certainly is targeting the wrong people. But, that is all he can do. To target Saudis and Arabs you'd have to speak the language, and sadly, he doesnt.

Oh, they also removed his name for the running of the "Brass Crescent Awards" because the organisers didnt believe he was an Arab or a Muslim.

Abu Sinan
Date:May 23rd, 2006 04:30 pm (UTC)
It would seem that RP has messed up the Arabic again. He transliterates on his blog today.

في ذكر الشهيد أهل فلسطين
A post dedicated to The martyrs of falisdeen:

Not on my blog, pal.

Edited By Siteowner

Not even a first year Arabic student would mistake "ط" for a "d" sound. The word that he is looking for, if he knew Arabic, is "Falasteen" meaning Palestine. Game, set, match with this mistake. Adding the "d" sound to the word changes everything. In Arabic the word "deen" means religion.
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Date:May 25th, 2006 07:30 pm (UTC)
Having successfully demonstrated that his fans are impervious to logic, now he's just gloating. Seriously, you could find out his true identity, post it for all the world to see, and he could _admit_ that he's been lying all this time, and his reader would still stick by him. Kinda like supporters of the Bush administration.
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